Holy Holidays in the Holy Land

Today was Yom Kippur.  For those of you who do not know what Yom Kippur is about, it is the day when the Jewish people fast from Sundown to Sundown (5:11 PM on Tuesday-6:08 PM on Wednesday this year specifically) and contemplate what they need to be forgiven about from the past year.  You fast because it is supposed to be a struggle and a challenge.  On most holidays you greet people with Chamag Sameach (happy holiday) but today you say Tzom Kahl (easy fast).  This is because Yom Kippur is not a happy holiday.  It is actually a very difficult holiday because you are supposed to suffer in order to be forgiven.  I usually fast at home but not like I did here.  At home I will have a normal night and then I just won't eat the next day but I will still drink water.  Here I stopped eating before 5:11 and didn't eat or drink anything until about 6:15 the next day.  Even though it was not that challenging I feel that I did it correctly and I feel like I can start the new year on the right foot once again.  Around 4:00 I was at another apartment of some people in my group and we were just sitting around, waiting for the sun to set so that we could break the fast.  One of the girls suggested that we go around the room and discuss what we want to change or be forgiven for.  Even though I have thought about it over the past week or so, I didn't have much to say.  Normally, for the new year we say what we want to do, a new years resolution.  Yom Kippur is more about looking at the past year and forgiveness.  For me there is really not much I need to be forgiven for.  I tend to air on the side of caution.  I don't upset people, get angry, cause drama, lie, cheat, etc... I wasn't sure so I talked about some things that I want to achieve for the next year.  I said I want to really make an effort in learning Hebrew and actually impact some of my students live.  These were generic but I couldn't think of much at the time.  I have never been great with words and saying things at the right moment so I didn't really have that much to add to the conversation.

Everyone has their own way of dealing with the problems in their life.  Some need to talk to other people and argue to get it out, others take a walk or meditate to think it through privately, others exercise and get their heart rate up to solve their problems.  I like to write.  I have always been good at opening up in my writing and it is my way of exploring my thoughts.  Writing appeals to me most because it is a way that I can go back and forth in my head and then have a tangible object so I can really go back and think it through.  Sometimes I like to go back and read my thoughts when I need to solve my problems.  It doesn't just bring back the memories but it actually brings back the emotions and feelings I was experiencing when I was writing or what I was writing about.  After some time to think about what I need to be forgiven about I have come to some conclusions.  One is that I need to be more expressive about what I want or what I want to say.  If you know me well I tend to be very easy going, always ready to do what other people want and give a lending hand.  I think this is a great quality and actually take pride in the fact that I am always willing to help someone when they need me.  However, is it always the best thing for me?  I forget who said this but there is a quote that says "all humans are selfish beings."  I agree 100% with this quote even thought it may appear that I am  not selfish.  But it is actually selfish because helping other people makes me feel good about myself.  Also when other people think highly of me it makes me feel good about myself.  I am not saying that I should stop giving to others and making sure the people around me are safe or comfortable or happy.  I am saying that I need to look out for my own happiness and pleasure a little more.  I need to say no to people a little bit more, or call someone out for doing something wrong, even if confrontation makes me feel awkward.  That may be the root of my Yom Kippur repentance.  I am so afraid of and opposed to confrontation that I tend to avoid it all together.  If someone offends me I tend to brush it off and not let it bother me.  But maybe sometimes it does bother me and I should tell that person that it did. 

Anyways, this is why I like writing.  I am not sure if I would have come to this conclusion if I was talking to someone and I probably wouldn't remember it if I thought about it on a walk.  Now it is here, forever.  I have a permanent record of how I want to become a better person. How I want to change my life this year.  This may not be easy and I know confrontation is uncomfortable for me, but over the past few years I have overcome many of my fears.  I overcame my fear of dark water when I took a SCUBA class.  I became very independent and don't feel uncomfortable in new or unfamiliar situations.  So why can't I overcome my fear of confrontation.  This may be difficult but it is something that I know I can overcome.  I won't go out to seek confrontation but I need to get more vocal when something bothers me.  I actually had a dream last night that I broke up a brawl of about 40 people.  I won't get into it but I raised my voice and took command of the situation.  People listened to me.  They stopped fighting.  They became quiet.  I had control.  I was a leader, a peacemaker, I was who I think I want to become. 

Shonah Tovah (happy new year)

Shabat Shalom Everyone,

Last night was our third shabat dinner.  Back in the US I don't think I celebrated shabat once but here it is almost impossible for shabat to slip through your mind.  We don't do too much for the holiday but we say the blessings for the candles, wine, and challah.  After that we eat dinner and everyone brings a dish to pass.  Last night my apartment hosted shabat and I would say it was a success. 

On another note we finally finished training at the college in Holon.  This involved 2 weeks of taking a bus 30 minutes to Holon and sitting through lectures and classes that may or may not be useful for the next 10 months.  I am sure some of the stuff will be helpful but they tried to pack too much information into a short training period.  But now that training is over we start working in the schools.  The other day we received our placements and I am very excited about mine.  The only negative part is that it is the farthest away, but that is an easy problem to deal with.  I am working with Becca who is very easy going and I think we will work well together.  The school is in Lod and it is a newer school in a newer area.  They also have a focus on environmental education and this is the first year they are having ITF members there.  I start on Wednesday so I will have more details by then. 

Last Tuesday bot the ITF group and the Community Involvement Groups were invited to the September 11th ceremony near Jerusalem at the memorial.  I thought it was a huge honor that we were invited to the event.  The US ambassador to Israel was the first person to speak and then after that a bunch of other people spoke.  The main thing that stuck out to me was when someone spoke about the Israeli's that died in the attack.  There were 5 native Israeli's.  I'm not sure of the details of each person but one was a CEO and graduated Summa Kum Laude from MIT, he was also the keynote speaker on the 100+ floor that day.  Another was on one of the flights.  Apparently he acted because they were speaking very nervously in Arabic but when he acted, another person behind him stabbed him to death.  He was also a highly decorated member of their military and served in some elite division.  It seemed as if every Israeli that they talked about had an amazing successful life before this tragedy, leaving newborns, wives, husbands, and family.  From the Israeli point of view it is easy to think about 5 people and keep track of their stories and successes.  But in the US we had over 3000 people and I don't think I could tell you one of their stories.  Here are a few pictures from the ceremony

 This is the memorial

 After the ceremony we could go put a rose on the memorial

The next day, Wednesday, we didn't have training because we were going to a school in Ramla and then in the afternoon we went to Jaffa to listen to some speakers.  The school was a high school so we were all a little confused as to why we were going there but it was a great experience.  The name of the school translated into "Last Chance High School."  This was because no other schools wanted these kids, who were all trouble makers, and never did anything in school.  Even though the students were on their last chance, it was successful.  This is probably because of the principle (who is no longer there) named Chilli (pronounced hilly).  In the documentary we watched about the school, someone said something about him that stuck out to me.  They said he is a great teacher because he has a quality that you can not acquire, people will follow him with their eyes closed.  This is a type of quality that I want but unfortunately I don't think I have it.  Very few people have a leadership skill like this but for some reason it is very powerful and you can not really explain it.  My birthright tour guide has this quality and now he is not a guide, he trains people in the army.  The other reason for the school's success is one of the teachers who won the National Teacher of the Year award.  She is also no longer with the school but will come back next year.  It was a really cool experience and we got to ask some of the students questions.  One of the questions someone asked was, why do you think these people had so much success? and they answered that they truly cared about the students.  Failure was not an option, and teaching was a 24/7 job, inside and outside of the classroom.  This was their key to success.  

Later in the day we went to Jaffa for some speakers who had a lot to say.  The only problem was that I was finding it hard to draw a connection to what they were talking about and what we were in Israel to do.  But after the lectures, we had the choice to stay in Jaffa/Tel Aviv, rather than taking the bus back.  I went with a few people to rent some bikes from the public bike system.  We had a bit of trouble figuring it out at first but it was great once we got the bikes.  We just coasted along the coast from the old port of Jaffa to the new port of Tel Aviv.  We stopped for frozen yogurt and then circled back to the beach.  One of my friends from Ithaca is also in Tel Aviv, studying abroad.  David Barken met up with us at the Tel Aviv port and biked back to the beach with us.  Then we just got some food and jumped into the Mediterranean.  By the time we swam it was dark and then we just went home.  It was a lot of fun and the bikes were only 30 shekels for the 2.5 hours.  The great thing about the bikes too is that you can lock them up in any station and then take another one out later.  Although I may get my own bike here since my school is located far away.  

That is about it for now.   I have the next few days free for Rosh Hashonna and on Sunday my roommate, Paul, and I are going to a host family, which should be a great experience. 

The Long Adventure Begins Soon

This week we started training at a university in Holon.  The training started with some lectures in a huge hall for a few hours.  Most of the information was in one ear and out the other but a few things did stick with me.  The first is that Masa means journey.  Masa is the huge organization that the ITF is a part of.  The other is that since we have 10 months here, we need to take it slow.  When people travel for a few weeks at a time or when Birthright took me around Israel, they move so fast that you don't get to stop and look around.  You get to see a lot but you just see the icing on the cake and do not get to sink your teeth into the many sweet layers that are hidden beneath.  10 months is a long time.  At the end I know I will be saying how fast it went but for right now, it is a long time.  I love the term "Island Time" and it reminds me to take a step back and look around.  When people are always in a rush they miss things, they miss the world around them and I want to take a step back and enjoy the world around me.  They also talked about teaching and the Israeli school system but I will experience that on my own rather than letting someone else tell me what to expect. 

The rest of the training was a little boring.  They had some good advice and for the most part what they told us will be useful, but I think it could have been better.  Unfortunately I do not really feel prepared but I know I am a fast learner and I am sure I will be fine.  I just really want to start doing what I came here to do and get my school placement and meet the teachers.

Today was the first step in the right direction for me because we actually got to see one of the schools.  Our group of 15 teachers split up into 3 groups and got a tour of the schools, and sat in on some classes.  Many of the staff members tell us that we are lucky to be a part of the Ramla ITF group.  This is because it is different than many of the other groups.  First of all, Ramla is one of the most diverse cities in all of Israel so we will get to teach Jewish, Arab, Ethiopian, and immigrants from all over the world in the same class.  Many of these children have also never left Ramla and have never met anyone from the United States.  The staff says that we have the opportunity to really make an impact on the lives of these students as long as we are motivated to make that impact.  From the experience in the school today I can see that we will be making a difference.  All of the students were very interested in us and they see us as role models.  The lady taking my group on the tour explained how in our first few days the children will come up to us and touch us, talk to us, and poke us as if checking to see that we are indeed real. 

I am extremely excited to start this journey, to overcome the challenges, and to achieve my goals no matter how large or small they may be.